Ive been trying to get in touch with the girls caseworker for weeks to see if she is any closer to knowing what "the plan" is. Nothing. Today was court, I had asked the caseworker via email to arrange for me to appear by phone as we have done in the past. Since I didnt hear from her, I asked the lawyer to do it yesterday. Nobody did it. Court is over now and I have no idea what happened. I had to re sched. my much needed dental appointment.
I feel so torn over this. Part of me wants our limitations to be acknowledged and respected by social services. We told them we couldn't properly care for 3 special needs girls and 1 special needs baby. We gave them several months to find a suitable arrangement. Hopefully something long term. They have managed nothing. My ego tells me that they need to stay here because Im the only person that can properly care for them, and that we will just make it work because they have to. I already have little girl things taking up nearly every corner of the house. I dont know where we would put a baby. I dont know what I would do with the ladies if Brian and I had to spend time in the NICU with Titus.
I just want their social worker to throw me a bone and tell me that shes doing what she can. If you give an inch, they will take a mile.
Also, the girl's father phoned this afternoon told me that their great grandmother is in town, and wants to see the girls. I told him he would have needed to arrange that through the case worker. He was pissed. He said he is leaving town in two days because everything "went to shit" here. I say good riddance. He was to have started his DHS supervised visits this Friday.
So thats the latest. Its me worrying about everyone getting their needs met. I suppose it will all fall into place but man.. I really dont like this feeling like its out of my hands. We tried to be so honest about what we are capable of.
I feel so torn over this. Part of me wants our limitations to be acknowledged and respected by social services. We told them we couldn't properly care for 3 special needs girls and 1 special needs baby. We gave them several months to find a suitable arrangement. Hopefully something long term. They have managed nothing. My ego tells me that they need to stay here because Im the only person that can properly care for them, and that we will just make it work because they have to. I already have little girl things taking up nearly every corner of the house. I dont know where we would put a baby. I dont know what I would do with the ladies if Brian and I had to spend time in the NICU with Titus.
I just want their social worker to throw me a bone and tell me that shes doing what she can. If you give an inch, they will take a mile.
Also, the girl's father phoned this afternoon told me that their great grandmother is in town, and wants to see the girls. I told him he would have needed to arrange that through the case worker. He was pissed. He said he is leaving town in two days because everything "went to shit" here. I say good riddance. He was to have started his DHS supervised visits this Friday.
So thats the latest. Its me worrying about everyone getting their needs met. I suppose it will all fall into place but man.. I really dont like this feeling like its out of my hands. We tried to be so honest about what we are capable of.
As someone who works in "the system," this is so frustrating for me to hear, and yet not at all surprising. Those social workers are SO over worked (not an excuse) and if kids are in a good place, they tend to just let their duties go trusting they are taken care of. And this is NOT fair for you. At all. Do the kids have ANY kind of therapist or service provider who could advocate on your behalf? I can assure you that if I were their therapist, I'd be advocating BIG time in court and out of court on your (and the girls') behalf. This is so, so sad - the system is failing them. Makes me angry. They are lucky to have you, but no one can blame you if you have to let them go - you have tried to do it in a thoughtful way. Good luck to you. You are amazing for all you have done for these girls - don't let the system's failures make you question that for ONE second.
ReplyDeleteFaith, if you give me an email address maybe I can tell you about it in a little more detail. :) Thanks for your support.
ReplyDeleteIm having a hard time commenting on any blog including my own. gah.
giantsquid000@hotmail.com
What a tough situation. You have tried to do everything right by these girls and no one is helping. How frustrating. I'm thinking of you often and praying for your family.
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