Would any of you gals dealing with RPL be interested in forming a small support group ? I am no longer able to attend my real life, live group. Because there are too many pregnant women there at any given time, and they just go so late, and I always have to get up early the next morning to work. I was thinking we could find a live chat room somewhere or perhaps do msn messanger. Maybe once a week. Let me know if youre interested.
I have to confess that Im in a pretty bad place emotionally speaking. Trying to figure out how much is too much in the TTC department. One of the really ass burning things about RPL is that there is never closure. Its fresh grief after fresh grief and it just never seems to stop. There is a large part of my brain that is urging me to throw in the towel, but Im not quite there. I think there would be too many what ifs if I dont at least try one more pregnancy. Im looking for advice. I know many of you are dealing with or have delt with the same issue. I know this is so personal, but Im really curious, what would you do if you were me ? For those that dont know my whole story I can try to give you the readers digest version. I was pregnant at 22, it was unplanned and very upsetting. I was having a strange orange colored discharge and spotting. The nurses at planned parenthood told me my pregnancy would be "high risk" due to an unidentified uterine infection (which years later I found out was nothing worse than a super flared up case of bacterial vaginosis). An ultrasound showed I was at the tail end of five weeks, and we saw a heartbeat. I had an abortion. Less than a year later I was pregnant again by the same partner. I miscarried violently before I had a chance to make a prenatal appointment, I was 7 weeks. That relationship ended, and I didnt give a lot of thought to having children until I was in my late 20's and fixing to get married. I diagnosed myself as having a fertility problem, but my OB had me monitor my cycles for a full year before she did a workup. Turns out I was right all along. I was pregnant after my second round of clomid in September of '08. Missed miscarriage diagnosed at 11.5 weeks. The fetus made it about 9 weeks. D&C. pregnant again after another couple of clomid cycles. Early bleeding but heart beat detected at 6 weeks 3 days. No heartbeat at 8 week scan. Forced break for three months, then pregnant again last summer after one measly clomid cycle. I didnt know I was pregnant and thought a heavy brown bleed was my period, so I took more clomid. I only took an HPT about two weeks into that cycle cause I started bleeding again. I dont really ovulate on my own, but so far that seems to be the only impediment to getting pregnant.Ive recently completed my 4th medicated cycle in a row (I did take a ttc break after 3 clomid cycles). I figure I have about 3 real options. I can keep trying with the oral stimulation drugs. I can save my money for an IVF with donor eggs. I can save my money for a domestic adoption. Because my RPL is idiopathic, they do say that my chances of going to term are decent. I feel at such a loss, any advice or insight would be much appreciated.
21 hours ago